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User blog:Spatulus/Dr Eva Rosalene and Dr Neil Watts (Markiplier) VS Valentina Tereshkova and Neil Armstrong
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY Dr Eva Rosalene and Dr Neil Watts (Markiplier) VS Valentina Tereshkova and Neil Armstrong! BEGIN! Neil A: Hey Valentina, let's show these scientists a thing about space Their pixelated faces needs a steppin like on the moon I surfaced Valentina T: I'm 1 outta 400, the same number of times I do to kill I've worked the fields, Soviet years, now am here to whoop these dills Neil A: OH! That's one small step for man, but I classify you as 'mankind' It's fine and gravity will never drop my heart beating rhymes Valentina T: You can access our memories and all you'll see is leading successes The only memories you both possess is stresses, messes and company oppresses Neil A: Don't forge my name, Watts. Do you even have a degree? Technically, you've never been to NASA, it was all just Johnny's memory Valentina T: And Eva, you'll never ever find yourself a WALL-E Even when your days are over, you'll forever be your partner's Molly [ [ [ Eva Rosalene: Neil! Please help me carry this dreaming machine I will teach these two astronauts a lesson about Rosalene being mean Like I said, the ending isn't important, we're here to do our job We are Sick-mund Corporators, ... Neil Watts: Is it my turn to throb? Eva Rosalene: Fine, go ahead, you stupid owl. Neil Watts: Ahem, I will need to swallow some painkillers before this battle starts Because Armstrong and Tereshkova just don't make the cut I am a humorous protagonist but not that type who make fart jokes Okay, maybe sometimes, but if it's time to be smart and serious, I come with the chokes Eva Rosalene: For River, we will be roleplaying the game of this rap battle It's no matter, that our two foots be pressing continuously onto your butts to settle Neil Watts: The wins, the sadness, your divorces, and these galactic baboons Eva and Neil: Kicking both your asses right back To The Moon! [ [ [ Neil Armstrong: Call that a rap? Your words stink more than the dead rabbit Valentina T: We will crush you like road kill, which Joey got hit Neil A: It would take you both double your lifetimes to orbit around the Earth Could call you Privacy Invaders and I have dreamed of flying since birth Valentina T: Sure, your story was depressing, compressing emotions into gaming Remember those events, because in the end, you’ll be dealing the same thing Neil A: She’s a hero, Valentina T: And he’s the Commando Neil A: I’ve worked my butt for Apollo, and I’d move EVA into contemporary So that I can get a closer look to send you out of the boundary! Valentina T: And in my trips to the shutter, I have proved that women are capable However, judging by both your personalities, just proves to be incomparable Neil A and Valentina T: Maybe it is time to morph into tadpoles and relieve your mementos, Just try to be independent, and leave the space exploring to us, weirdos. Neil A: It won’t take long. I would have rather battled Galileo Galilei Valentina T: Than two fictional characters who don’t even exist in reality Prepare the launch early, so we can trap these cosmonaut wannabes Neil A: All progress will be lost, and the Eagle has landed Mystery creates wonder, and it’s something failures will never understand. [ [ [ Eva Rosalene: Try to call me weird again, and your face will be part of the moon You can never handle us two, and we will alter your ambition soon Neil Watts: We will fold you like origami Eva Rosalene: What else? Neil Watts: And we will poke you like beach ball novelty Eva Rosalene: What else? Neil Watts: And we will stuff you with pickled olives… Eva Rosalene: What else? Neil Watts: And we will light you up… may I shout some expletives? Eva Rosalene: What Watts was gonna say is that the lighthouses in the sky Will direct upon your eyes and blind you for life! Neil Watts: Wow… but I don’t actually think that is possible Eva Rosalene: Oh just shut up and direct your attacks and give them the tussle Neil Watts: Right! HIT THAT MUSIC! We will destroy these puny weaklings like animatronic animorphs with a passion Stripping them nude like an Emperor’s new clothes without any form of tension Connecting their memories and removing what they wished for first Smearing their faces in a game of carnival, to be as ugly as a toy platypus And.. Eva Rosalene: AND.. that’s enough, Neil I’m impressed by your skills However, it’s time for you to quench your thirst, and me to fill your fills Increase that ticking, this is the moment to get things right No more horsing around, get ready for me to bring this to light Neil: EVA! EVA! You shouldn’t act any more rasher or history will repeat its course Everything's alright, we don't really need to go to such a force... Why not let's pack our bags and leave... my throat's getting hoarse Are you listening? EVA? Please announcer, stop this before … [ [ [ *Everyone disappears* WHO WON? WHO’S NEXT? YOU DECIDE! Neil: we create a path of remorse!!!! Wait … ahem, sorry. Go ahead… EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY! WHO WON? Dr Eva Rosalene and Neil Watts Valentina Tereshkova and Neil Armstrong Category:Blog posts